If man is five.

Like most aging hipsters and/or indie kids who were still in diapers when Doolittle was originally released, I saw the Pixies last week. It was a good show, albeit surprisingly short and encore-free for the hard-earned dough I spent on it. And there weren't even any air-brushed paintings of the band in front of which to have my picture taken as there were at the R. Kelly/Jay-Z show I went to for free a month or two ago. What a gyp! (Holy crap, I'm 32 and I think, while typing that out, I just realized that gyp might be a derogatory term generating from stereotypes of gypsies. If so, my apologies!)

Anyhoo ... I saw the Pixies and lots of people like the Pixies. Unfortunately, very few of the bands who cover the Pixies appear to actually be even one-tenth as good, but they're certainly better than most of the predictable tracks on that stupid emoey (shut up, it's a word) tribute that came out a while back. I don't take enough drugs anymore to fully enjoy most of these tracks. But you might.

The first two are from Hey, a "CD" that's downloadable via a FrankBlack.net along with a Frank Black solo tribute. (Read how you too can get a hold of it here, if you have the patience.) Actually, the third song is on that too, although I got it initially from the Death to the Pixies, We're Better! (as if) tribute, from whence the fourth and fifth tracks come as well. The last track is from what I thought was a Japanese (but now appears not to be) Tribute to the Pixies, from which you might remember that insane version of "Debaser" by Feed I posted a while back.

Clootie "Holiday Song"
An interesting, somber take that kinda makes me want to slash my wrists.

Jonus "I've Been Tired"
I like Lou Reed, he said. And Dylan. And I sound like John Flansburg. And I sighed, "Ahhhhhh."

Mother Universe "Debaser"
This soooo could have been on the soundtrack to Electric Dreams. Or Kidd Video.

Pixels "Gigamuffin (Um, an instrumental Gigantic and a cat named Muffin?)"
Meow Meow like meow meow beats, whistles and sirens.

Koos Kreuk "Waar is mijn Hoofd? (Where is my Mind?)"
This was my favorite Pixies song until a few years ago when it wound up in Fight Club, which is weird considering I liked Fight Club. I'm kooky. Now that I've heard this harmonica-drenched version, I like it even less.

Seafood "Levitate Me"
This makes me miss the era in which I wanted to have sex with Britpoppers. Won't they please fawn over me???

Where I belong, I'm right.

I wish I had more time in my week to point you all in the direction of covers on other mp3 blogs when they arise, but I just don't. Covers are immensely popular in blogland and they're everywhere. Still, I found a few extra minutes today, so here are a few that might interest you.

You can find ex-Dismemberment Plan member Travis Morrison singing an amusing cover of Ludacris' "What's your Fantasy" on this page. (This one gets extra points because I hadn't heard it before.)

Marc Almond and the Royal Philharmonic sing "Paint it Black" here.

SVC has a few covers in this entry, including a longtime favorite of mine, My Bloody Valentine's cover of Wire's "Map Ref 41N 93W."

David F has an electronically mangled "My Cherie Amour" here, also heretofore unknown to me.

Now for some of my own picks:

Frank Bennett "Disarm" (Smashing Pumpkins cover)
Another cover crooner in the style of your Richard Cheeses and the like, but Bennett plays up the Rat Packiness of his namesakes a bit more faithfully than the others while singing a more diverse selection. For instance, I never suspected I'd hear a swinger version of Nick Cave's "Red Right Hand."

Maisie "Fixing a Hole" (Beatles cover)
Italian music blog MusicBoom put together a downloadable tribute to the Beatles a while back that features unique combination of songs by (Italian, of course) indie, lo-fi and electronic acts. It's no longer available at the site, but here's a taste.

The Quakes "Killing Moon" (Echo and the Bunnymen cover)
This is my favorite track from Swing-a-Billy Chartbusters from Germany's swing label, Frankie Boy Records.


The next two tracks come from one of my favorite tribute albums of the past year or so, Stop Me if you think You've Heard this One Before. Of course, I'm not sure that's a rousing review, since most tribute albums really suck. But the way I see it, any tribute album that can get me to listen to a Mazzy Star song without retching has some merit.

The Delays "Ride it On" (Mazzy Star cover)

Detroit Cobras "Last Nite" (Strokes cover)

Tuesday, I am fading.

I only have 20 minutes left in my lunch hour, so I have to make this quick. First, lemme say that I am totally for democracy, I just couldn't find time in my schedule to participate in the Music Bloggers for Democracy thing. Hell, I can barely manage to post once a week right now. Who knew I could go from unemployed sloth to promotion material in a few short months?

Almost Better "Pieces of Me" (Ashley Simpson cover)
Now that we've all recovered from Ashleegate, I thought I would prove to you that, even when she's lip-synching, I'd still rather hear a saptastic song like this sung by a female pseudopunk nepotist than sung by your standard male emo whiner. Almost better, indeed.

Jason Falkner "Photograph" (Def Leppard cover)
I love Falkner's covers. This one, from the Metal Rules comp, makes me very happy.

Graham Coxon "That's When I Reach for My Revolver" (Mission of Burma cover)
I can take or leave Coxon's solo stuff, but he sure is dreamy.

Toy Dolls "Livin' La Vida Loca" (Ricky Martin cover)
I didn't even realize the Toy Dolls were still around to release albums in the new millennium. Wonders never cease. I think more punk songs need kazoos. You?

Backmask "Genie in a Bottle" (Christina Aguilera cover)
Oh, death metal. How I love your pop leanings. This is death metal, right? You'd think two episodes into Battle for Ozzfest I'd be an expert on the different metal genres, but no. All I know is that that lawyer with the freaky contact lenses gets on my last nerve and I hope he gets axed soon.